How quickly the time goes… Everly is 4 months old now! We recently bought an external hard drive to store all 5000 (and counting) photos and video files of our little gal and in the process of moving files I was looking at so many “old” pictures of her. Now when I say “old pictures” or “when she was little” this actually means 4 months ago, how sad is that, lol! Everyone tells you that you forget how small they once were and that time moves so quickly when they are young and of course like everything else you think that won’t be the case for you- but it is. When I look at those pictures of her so tiny and fragile, I remember her slight weight in my arms and her newborn squeaks; she didn’t actually start crying until she was 12 weeks old, not sure why she felt the need to start but here we are anyway, he he he. If I am thinking this way now, I can only imagine how I am going to feel when she gets her drivers license or graduates from high school, or if she gets married and has a family of her own. So this is how my parents feel… wow!
We are in full effect teething mode right now. I still maintain that the teething process is more difficult on parents who are used to an easy going, good sleeping baby- it knocks us on our asses to be exact. I would have to say that we are feeling the sleep deprivation more than we did when she was a newborn- at least then we were expecting to be up more often. I have read so much in the last few days about infants and sleep. I have been wondering if she is sleeping poorly because of her teeth or the crib transition. I have been assured by many that it’s her teeth and not to worry, I have been assured by many that she will go back to being a good sleeper again. Despite the assurances, I figure that it can’t hurt to be prepared. I researched many different infant sleep theories and found that I can really relate to the strategy called Nightime Parenting (read it!). I think this more gentle approach fits us more philosophically as a family than a Ferber-type method, it also fits better with the baby-led schedule that we are currently practicing. Nightime parenting allows the parent to participate in the falling asleep of the baby. I typically need to read to fall asleep and so does Brandon… Hard core Ferberists would say that is our parents’ fault and would consider it a sleep crutch, well who cares; you know what, I won’t be heart broken if the baby has to read to fall asleep when she is an adult either!
Recently, I have been sensitive to comments made by mothers of another generation… you know them, trust me you do… the ones who think that we should have dinner on the table every night, plus all the chores done and take care of the baby without pause. I guess I am sensitive to these comments because they are not my congruent with my beliefs and of course that means I need to judge myself next to them and nit pick. One mother said to me that we younger moms are lucky that our men help; she said men of her generation would not have thought to, I quickly replied- did anyone ask them to? I know that our generation has had to, maybe it was just a simple “he can’t fix what he doesn’t know is wrong” scenario. Why was it accepted for dads to opt out? I like to think that had I been a mother back then I would have been a trailblazer… Brandon says this would have gotten me divorced. I said well really, what’s the difference if you did everything on your own anyway? What I wonder is how did entire generations of mothers not go completely nuts without any time to themselves or any activities outside the home? Were they stronger then? It’s hard to say, either way my hat goes off to those that did it well! An article in Today’s Parent said that today’s mothers have more stress with working and taking care of children, but they also said that more fathers participate in caregiving and chores. I think I would have been more stressed to do everything at home by myself, working is easy!