Last night I thought we were going to get away with only 25 minutes of crying- heck yeah! Well we got a little bit too full of ourselves, lol. She slept for 20 minutes after those 25 minutes of crying and then woke up to cry another 20! This was the first time we had to implement our “wait 20 minutes” part of our sleeptime strategy. When we first put her down for the night I was a complete coward and went up stairs for a bit so that B could stay with her and I wouldn’t have to hear her cry, but then I felt guilty sitting up there so I came back down and sat in her room. I thought I would take advantage of the fact that I could get some help, but I still felt really bad, almost worse. She slept great though once she fell asleep, didn’t wake up again until 6:00 am, at which time I fed her and she went back to sleep until 8:30 am! Just put her down for her fist nap of the day, we are a little off now because of her sleeping in, but I don’t mind one bit! She decided to pull all the stops for this naptime and cry for 20 minutes too- thanks baby! Usually she only cries for 10 to 15 minutes max for naps, but yesterday she was spoiled and got to fall asleep in the car, ha ha ha!
I have to admit that the crying is getting to me. Sometimes I walk around here and I feel almost shell shocked. I just have this dazed mind and a nagging little head pounding thing behind my forehead. My body feels more tired and it aches more and I just don’t feel as bright and sunny. I think all of this crying is a little bit hard to take psychologically, I really do. It is wearing on me now and I can see how a lot of people would quit when it gets to this point. The way I see it though is that we have come this far and are seeing benefits and decreases in crying time so why would we stop to just start again one day at square one? I just keep telling myself to stay strong. It’s easier to just continue on and watch as things (hopefully) get better and better. It’s easier when I am not at home alone, support and distraction are good. It’s much more tempting to cave in when you are all alone and no one would know, but you would know so then you let out a big sigh and go blog about it as the baby screams angrily in the background! I love motherhood : )
Pumpkin Patch pictures as promised!