Elizabeth Pantley Will You Marry Me?

Okay, I know she is married already, but maybe she would leave her husband and come live with Everly and I? As you may have guessed I just started reading The No Cry Sleep Solution  by Elizabeth Pantley and  I love it. I think what makes me love it, is that she is realistic. There is one section called realistic goals and do you know what it says? Well I will tell you what it says… it says that sleeping for a 5 hours stretch is considered sleeping through the night for a baby, hmmm, if you go by that, Everly has been sleeping through the night since she was a few weeks old. There was not any nonsense talk like… my program will make your baby sleep 12 hours uninterruped and if your baby doesn’t you are doing something wrong and probably a huge failure. The language in this book is so supportive and loving towards the baby. While I was reading it I was thinking, yes, this is where I need to be. So today we did steps 1, 2 and 3. The first two are basic info and safety stuff and the third is a sleep log. Tomorrow we will set out our plan, yes that’s right our plan. And you know what? No you don’t know what, but again I am going to tell you… Everly doesn’t have to cry. How do you like them apples. Instead of letting her cry, we will be helping her to learn to fall back asleep on her own, doesn’t that seem more fair?!

I also have to take the time to admit that the beginning of the book made me feel like a terrible mother. It wasn’t anything that the author said per say, it was my reaction to it. She gave researched based reasons why babies should not be left to cry it out and although I have read many of these reasons before there were some new ones. There was one especially that made me cry, it was written from the baby’s perspective, how they may feel when they wake up in the middle of the night. Now I understand that a lot of that is subjective and that no one really knows what the baby is thinking, but I know that left in the same situation I would not be feeling that great either. Once more I was left feeling that I should have done more than a quick overview of the different schools of thought out there on sleep training. But like I said before, I just went with what seemed to work for everyone around me. We all do that so I am trying not to beat myself up about it. I  know that I wasn’t being a bad mother and that I was just trying to help my baby to learn something the best way that I knew how. I don’t want to be misunderstood here and sound like I think that parents who let their babies cry it out are bad parents, that’s not it at all! The crying it out method just did not work for us, it has worked great for a lot of people though; I believe that you have to go with what suits your family best.

Everly has had a bit of a cold since Christmas Eve, this is her first cold and it was not a welcome first! She is pretty stuffy and has a little cough. We have been giving her saline squirts up the nose and even gave her some Advil Cold for infants because she was running a little bit of a temperature. We took her to the doctor yesterday who said that she looks fine and it’s just a cold that is hanging on, he said that if it is not gone in 3 days to bring her back in. Lucky for us, the cold hasn’t made her more grumpy during the day, unlucky for us, it has made her more grumpy during the night- argh! Combine this with teeth that are trying to cut through and you have a lovely little gem of a baby in the middle of the night, lol! She has been waking a little more than usual and last night I just gave up and brought her to bed with us, she didn’t sleep much better there unfortunately. Ahh baby, I hope the cold goes away and the teeth pop out, I hate seeing her like this.

What has struck me as interesting lately is how much Everly is like me. I know in theory how personality is thought to develop and am aware of the whole nature/nurture argument and have to say that I am leaning a lot towards nature, ha ha. In all honesty I think it’s somewhere in the middle. For example I see character traits of my own that I like about myself and I nurture those in her and the same goes for her dad. The traits that I don’t like too much about my personality she is picking up too though, and I am not reinforcing them, lol- how does that work?!? It’s just so weird to look at her behaving in a certain way or moving her face into an expression in reaction to something and knowing that I behave and react the same way. I was once told that our children take what we have and bring it up another level- if that’s true we had better hope that Everly only amps up the positive qualities or we are on for some TROUBLE! lol!



Filed under Daily Check In

2 responses to “Elizabeth Pantley Will You Marry Me?

  1. kristen

    i had forgotten about that book – mathias and i used it when cole was about everly’s age and i really liked it as well! by the way, i love reading your blogs. i hope you keep them going 🙂

  2. Donnette Hence

    Great article for new dog lovers like me who want to know about looking after their animal. There appears to be so much to learn that it is overwhelming, but sites like this really help. Thanks!

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