Overheard in our house… Once you have been married a while (nearly two years for us) and have been together even longer (14 years for us in December) you develop a very comfortable friendship. You say things to your partner that you would never say to anyone else. You are an open book and you don’t fear judgement. Sometimes you say the stupidest things and sometimes you say things that would embarass you to pieces if anyone else heard them live. Well here I am to share those moments so that you can have a laugh this Wednesday.
Him: plays ringtone of “I’ll be Missing You” and says here’s your ringtone for my phone.
Me: But I’m not dead. That can be my ringtone when I am dead.
Him: You won’t be calling me when you’re dead though.
Me: That’s what you think.
Me: Babe do you want to watch The Hills or The City? (look at me being nice and giving him a choice!).
Him: The Hills. I don’t know the characters of The City as well, (pause), that doesn’t leave this room.
Him: Sits down on couch as we watch “Say Yes to the Dress” I bring him Ben and Jerry’s cookie dough ice cream. Eats ice cream
Me: Sits down and says, “congratulations babe, you are officially a woman; watching Say Yes to the Dress and eating boutique ice cream.”
Him: signs and continues eating ice cream unaffected.
Him: Doing pull ups on the monkey bars when we are at the park with our daughter. Says, “Am I turning you on?”
Me: No, was that the plan? (thinking I guess I should be by this obvious display of manly strength and muscle).
Him: (bashful) I don’t know.
Me: Honestly it turns me on more when I come home to find you vacuuming or emptying the dishwasher- now that’s sexy.
Him: You are wearing the Green Bay Packers underwear that I bought you.
Me: Yep. These are the underwear that I wear when I think I might poop my pants.
Forgive me husband, I know that I may suffer for this post, but the hillarity of it demanded that it be shared.